Working or Staying Home with the Baby. An All Time Dilemma.

I bet you were always the career type of person. You never really thought about dedicating your whole life to one thing only, because you loved the thrill and dynamics. Except, your baby is not a thing.

You are just vulnerable in front of his sweet innocent eyes, and can’t get yourself to go back to work after being used to that warm setting every day. Motherhood has you all excited!

Society doesn’t make it any easier on you either, as they seem to be giving you divided perspectives, judging your abilities to balance between work and family or questioning your willingness to resign with grace and stay home. So what are you supposed to do, how do you solve the dilemma?

Your decision though, can’t really be based on what you should do, to make a good mum figure in people’s eyes. It should be based instead on what makes you feel fulfilled, both in the short term and long term. The odds are in your favor, as you are free to access plenty of research that consists on information which will give you a clue, of what's it like to be a working mother or a stay at home one.

You get the best of both worlds (the worst as well), by just typing and searching, although I am slightly scared that you will be left off with the same confusion. That, because what is shared there is also double-sided. Lots of pros and cons and staying home, or vice versa.

What is well known to this extent, is that both of these options have their yin and yangs. No stay at home mum will ever tell you that child-care is going all peachy. That’s because focusing on this aspect only, does require some sort of isolation, causing depression and sadness to mothers with time passing by. On the other hand, you will hear plenty of drama from working mothers as well. Concerns on them not being home enough, missing out on their toddler’s first word (first cuss, most of the time), first steps or simply just being there staring at his angelic face while he sleeps.

However, studies have shown that children whose mums work tend to become more successful and more independent at the same time, gaining problem-solving skills and some hellova inspiration. So if you're concerned about not being present enough, at least get some comfort by knowing that you are transmitting role model qualities that will grow your children to be future leaders.

Given the cost of contemporary dynamics though, one does not always have the luxury to choose. But, if your financial situation does not allow you to drop off work, you can always seek options for part-time work or move to work from home, not from a desk.

Remote jobs are so diverse nowadays, and you can find yourself creating the best working environment, while still being around your little ones. But, the final decision on your career should only make you feel better about yourself, as you go through the tough road of motherhood-ing properly, counting in beginners luck.

Thank you to guest blogger Ujëbardha Bekolli

Ujëbardha Bekolli is a writer for Mother Works, a job portal designed to bring together stay at home moms and recruiters. The platform also brings helpful articles in the Blog section regarding mothers who want to return to the workforce.